Addiction and How to Overcome Addiction

Addiction and How to Overcome Addiction


Addiction
Addiction is one of the most poorly
understood things on the planet.
Should I say misunderstood.
Most people point towards a
thing that somebody’s addicted to,
as if it is the original cause
of the addiction itself.
That’s a little bit like seeing
flies on a pile of garbage
and thinking that the flies
created that pile of garbage.
Every single addiction
is in fact a coping mechanism.
Engaging in that addiction,
provides some form of specific relief.
To cope is to make a specific alteration
mentally, emotionally or physically
so that you can manage
or adapt to something
that is causing you distress.
A coping mechanism is
a specific procedure,
process or technique or thing,
which manages to create
adaptation to distress.
Stress is serious business.
A person cannot thrive in
an atmosphere of stress.
So it only makes sense
that when we experience
distressing situations,
we would instantaneously
want to make a change to it.
However, that’s the thing.
When we can’t make a
change to something,
or think we can’t make
a change to something,
then we’re forced to cope with it.
This is especially true in childhood
when we did not call the
shots about our own life.
The people around us did.
To learn more about this,
watch my video titled:
How To Let Go of a Coping Mechanism
To understand addiction
I have a few analogies;
I want you to imagine that
somebody has a very deep wound,
but in their current circumstances
there’s no real way to
focus on healing that wound
or at least the person
believes there isn’t.
So what they have to do
is to find some way to mitigate the pain
that that wound is causing in their life.
This is what addiction is.
Here’s another analogy.
I want you to imagine that somebody
is stuck in a very very deep hole
and they believe
that it’s not possible to
get out of that hole.
An addiction, to whatever
it is they’re addicted to,
is like wings that attach to
the person temporarily,
and fly up out of hole,
but they can’t go sideways
so as to completely alleviate the problem.
Instead, it allows somebody to hover
right outside of that hole
for as long as a person is feeling relief
from that addiction they’re engaged in
and then they go back into the hole.
It is in essence,
self administered pain medication.
We will be looking for
a physiological variable
that dictates why some
people get addicted
and why some people don’t,
for the length of a Bible,
before we realize
that the real variable in the situation
is what emotional and mental wounding
a person experienced
that is causing them
to feel relief when they engage
in a particular behavior
or take a particular substance.
Specific variables in terms of
what type of pain people experience
and thus what they need relief from,
dictates very clearly
what somebody will actually
become addicted to.
So that you can understand what I mean,
I have a few examples.
People who experienced a serious rejection
and whom internalized the
negativity projected at them
from the person who rejected them,
tend to become hyper
critical of themselves.
They experience self hate.
They would have more of a tendency
to become addicted to cutting or bulimia.
A person who feels empty and powerless
to getting the kind of emotional
needs they need from others,
might have more of a tendency
to become addicted to S&M porn.
A person who is terrified
of their own emotions
because those emotions
have never been validated
or resolved and who has
been taught that the only
acceptable behavior is
emotional suppression,
might have more of a tendency to
become addicted to meditation.
A person who feels unsafe
to be themselves in relationships
and therefore feels they constantly
have to live in a state of pretense,
might have more of a tendency
to become addicted to alcohol.
A person whose nervous system
is constantly on high alert
and because of the pain
and distress in their life,
they’re feeling constant anxiety,
would have more of a tendency
to become addicted to opiates.
Conversely somebody who deals
with extreme levels of powerlessness
that puts them into a state of apathy,
may have more of a tendency
to become addicted to uppers.
Things like cocaine and amphetamines.
This is important,
because kind of substance or behavior
that a person becomes addicted to
and what that addiction creates for them,
is a good indication
about what the opposing
or to the opposite side trauma is,
or pain is,
that the person is trying
to get relief from.
There’s one study that I
find illustrates the fact
that this mental and emotional
component to addiction
is really where we need to be looking at
and is the variable
that creates addiction.
It was a study that was
done with a group of rats.
Now these rats were put in a cage
where there was cocaine laced into water.
Now naturally just like you’d predict,
these rats started to
obsessively drink the water
until they quite literally died.
Now the conclusion is obvious, isn’t it?
There is no amount of cocaine that’s safe,
because obviously the second you taste it,
based on the addictive nature
of cocaine in and of Itself,
you will get addicted.
Of course, that’s what DARE program
and other ridiculous programs like that
would have you believe.
But then the unsatisfied researcher
changed a variable.
Bruce Alexander
changed the cage itself.
In the original experiment the rats
were in a small cage by themselves
with no company no space
and no toys to play with.
In Bruce’s new experiment,
he constructed a rat park
with tunnels and turning wheels
and most importantly,
other rats to play with.
This time around,
none of the rats got hooked
on the drug laced water.
The conclusion was that it wasn’t
the drug that created addicts
but the cage and isolation
they were trapped in
that drove them to become addicts.
What should this tell you?
If the necessary ingredients
for a person’s well-being
do not exist,
a person is driven to having
to cope in certain ways.
And addiction is the greatest method,
for coping with something.
It’s a behavior that you
have noticed repeating
creates relief.
While specific variables in terms of pain
dictates what type of behavior
or substance a person will
become addicted to,
there is a variable that all addicts
without exception,
share whether they are actually
realizing it about themselves
and acknowledging it or not,
and that is loneliness.
On top of that,
because their well-being
or the ingredients necessary
for their well-being
is not really being met,
these people are in pain alone.
Now, all of you know that
the experience of going through addiction
doesn’t just impact an addict.
It impacts everyone in their life.
If you are in love with an addict,
your life is affected by that addiction.
And so there are a lot of support groups
for people who are in
relationships with addicts.
There are lots of people who
give advice about what to do
if you’re in a relationship with
somebody who’s addicted.
The problem is is that
most of these strategies
that they’ll give you including
he tough love one, especially,
only exacerbate the original problem.
These tough love strategies
for getting a person off of the addiction,
are not particularly empathetic.
Meaning you haven’t put yourself
in the shoes of the person
who is addicted,
really understood that
that addiction though it
may seem harmful to you,
to them, is in fact their rescue.
Now what that does is it puts people
in a parallel reality.
It means that the reality
they’re living in
is quite separate and
different to the reality
that you’re living in
and it makes them more
and more isolated.
Thus fueling the very conditions
that are creating the addiction
in the very first place.
For this reason,
if you’re suffering from an
addiction or know someone who is,
I encourage you to
watch my video titled:
The Most Dangerous Parallel Reality
I also encourage you to pick
up a copy of my book titled:
The Anatomy of Loneliness
in which I explain the exact
makeup of loneliness
as well as what causes it
and also how to solve it,
so you can feel connection instead.
All that being said,
I’m going to make a very bold statement.
These emotional conditions
and mental conditions
that create the addiction
in the first place
or the need for the relief
from that substance
or that behavior in the
first place, I should say,
on top of the loneliness
that is inherent to addiction,
is more important
than ever focusing on
the addiction itself.
The addiction, whatever the behavior
or substance it is that
a person is addicted to,
is in fact a symptom,
not the original cause of the issue.
And if you focus at it
as if it’s the cause,
you will never solve the addiction.
In fact, a person even
if they are going to be
capable of getting off of
that particular addiction,
will simply replace it
with a different one.
The only truly successful
addiction programs
are the ones that understand this.
They’re the ones that understand that
unless you deal with that
underlying wounding,
there is absolutely, nothing you can do
to get people to a state where
they are not addicted to something.
So the most successful addiction programs
are the ones who focus
at the addiction itself,
as if is a symptom.
The ones that I think are the very best,
put almost no effort, actually,
into helping a person
“get off” the substance.
All the focus is placed on
how to heal that underneath wounding.
Because what they understand is,
that if a person is using
an addiction, like a pain medication,
if you take care of the original
wound so there’s no more pain,
there really isn’t a reason to be using,
is there?
You have to get rid of the reason to use,
in order to make it so that the person
can let go of these types of behaviors.
Now that I have said that,
I do need to warn you
that the vast majority,
not even some, the vast majority
of addiction centers that
exist in the world today
are complete and total BS.
There are several reasons why,
but you do need to know that
if you’re dealing with addiction
or if you know somebody who is.
The first reason,
is that the majority of addiction centers
are not actually started by people
who are they themselves
educated in addiction.
And they are mostly run
with outdated ideologies
relative to addiction.
So many of these centers
are not started by people
who are in this line of work,
but who are businessman.
And these businessmen
see a very big opportunity
to extort massive amounts of money
not only from individuals themselves,
but also insurance companies.
Most also do not understand
that family and social dynamics
outside the center
are the single biggest factor
for whether somebody is
actually going to be able to
succeed with their rehabilitation process.
That’s why there’s such
a horrible relapse rate.
One of the reasons why,
when you take a person out
of the supportive environment,
provided it is supportive,
this supportive environment
and healthier dynamic
that’s taking place inside
of an addiction center,
put them back into their social sphere
and all of the patterns
that cause them to use in the
first place, are reinforced.
They fail to recognize addiction recovery
as a process that must include
family members and friends
or a complete change to a person’s
post-release social setting.
Otherwise, it is absolutely pointless.
But that there is another
problem, isn’t it?
Because if you really look deep into it,
there’s very little incentive
for an addiction center
to have somebody recover.
In fact, there’s a lot of financial
incentive for failure.
Less than half of the people
who enter into rehab programs
actually complete rehab.
And most who do, relapse again.
The centers actually benefit financially
by blaming this failure on the patient
and telling them that they
have to come back again.
At this point they can then charge them
exorbitant admission fees,
and charge them to be
there in rehab all over again.
And this creates the cycle of extortion.
Addiction treatment is a bit like
the neglected orphan in the
overall health care system.
I know it’s really tempting
when you’re addicted to a substance
and see that it’s a problem or when
you’re with somebody who’s addicted
and you see that it’s a problem,
to make an enemy of the
substance or behavior itself.
What you’re missing is
that even if you can see
that it is creating a problem
for the person or yourself,
it is their “rescue”.
That is more than a security blanket.
It is quite often, the thing
that is keeping them
emotionally and mentally able to survive.
And we have to understand that
in order to have the kind of compassion
and objective perspective
necessary to take the right action
steps and to say the right thing.
And I’m also going to tell you something;
you really don’t have a place
in the field of healing addiction,
until you understand that
there are levels of pain,
mental and emotional and
even physical on this planet
that makes selling your soul to the devil,
worth it.
When we try to stop a person’s
addiction to a substance or behavior
by making it about stopping
the substance or behavior itself,
without directly addressing the wound
they are trying to get relief
from through the addiction,
we are in fact doing more damage to them
and they will relapse or
switch to another addiction.
In order to overcome
addiction of any kind,
we have to be willing to go in
the exact opposite direction
from where we want to go.
Now we understand that for a human being
not just human being,
for beings on the planet earth,
it’s a natural tendency
and a survival tactic,
to go away from pain.
However, if we want to heal addiction,
unfortunately / fortunately
we have to go straight into it, instead.
So imagine that addiction in your life
or the pain I should say,
that you’re trying to get away
from through an addiction
is like this giant tornado
and it’s been chasing you
through your whole life.
The only actual way to
resolve this addiction
in this analogy,
is to stop running from the tornado,
turn around
and run straight into it.
This can be where it’s useful
to start reducing
or potentially,
depending on where you are,
stopping a substance or
behavior, all together.
Naturally,
when you don’t use a pain medication,
suddenly you feel the pain again, right?
So I want you to imagine this:
You’re in a hospital or
somebody is in the hospital
and suddenly you don’t give
them any more morphine.
When they start screaming and yelling
they can point directly to the
place where they’re in pain.
Obviously, by pointing to it,
a person is then able to say:
“Oh, Wow, I can now see
what the real issue is”,
and we can directly resolve that issue.
This is what has to happen
with the healing of addiction.
If a person does not engage
in the specific addiction
the wounds that a person is
trying to avoid with the addiction
will begin to start howling,
so to speak.
This makes it much easier
to directly become aware of and resolve
what is underlying that
addictive behavior.
Obviously, because there
are certain behaviors
and especially certain substances
where that process
of withdrawing from the
actual addiction itself,
is a lot more serious than others,
this should be a step that
you are directly prepared for.
That being said,
I’ve created a process
for doing specifically this.
It is called the completion process.
If you’re interested in learning
how to do this process,
pick up a copy of my book
that is quite literally titled:
The Completion Process
Or to find a practitioner
that can lead you through
the process, instead,
visit www.thecompletionprocess.com
So you can understand
what heals addiction,
I’m going to tell you a true story.
Pat was a professional athlete.
In his early life,
nothing he could do in his father’s eyes
was ever good enough.
Or that’s at least, his perception.
No matter what he did,
he couldn’t get that affection
or that approval.
But the closest he ever got,
was sports.
He noticed that any time he
was achieving something,
any time he was succeeding or winning,
he would get at least
some kind of feedback.
So he became absolutely
desperate for this approval
and poured himself into
sports more and more,
until he became a professional athlete.
Pat ended up making the Olympic team.
But of course the second that he did that,
he started panicking about
what might happen
if he lost instead of won.
Now, what’s really interesting
about the amount of stress and
tension that this put him into,
is that one month before he
actually went to the Olympic Games,
he got mono.
Now those of you who understand mono,
understand how difficult it would be,
to compete against all of
these world-class athletes
if you were at such a disadvantage.
Long story short,
he didn’t even come close
to making the podium.
Now, looking at his life,
he realizes: “Wait a minute…
In four years I’m literally going
to be too old to compete,
which means that this is the last
Olympics that I can ever engage in,
which means I will never
be a gold medalist,
which means my life makes
no sense whatsoever,
and I will never get what I
always wanted for my father.
With all of these feelings
of feeling insignificant,
feeling never good enough,
feeling unloved and unvalued,
he goes to a party one night.
He’s got nothing else to
do with his time now.
It’s pretty hard to dedicate
yourself to sports
and then all of a sudden overnight,
you have nothing going for
you in your life anymore
and no purpose and no direction.
At this party somebody
starts to crush up a pill…
Oxycontin.
They go: “Hey, take a hit.”
So he decides to snort it.
Now what’s really interesting is that,
pretty soon he starts to feel
better than he ever has.
That tension of never feeling good enough,
of feeling insignificant
and all of those things,
for the first time in his life,
goes away.
Long story short,
he goes back to do it again.
He develops more and more
and more of a tolerance.
Then the need increases.
He eventually runs out of money,
has to become a dealer himself,
just to get his hands on the
stuff that he is needing.
When he is found
stealing money out of his
mother’s purse one day,
they kick him out of the house.
After that, he gets put into
two different rehab centers,
both of which, after exorbitant
amounts of money are paid,
He ends up relapsing
and relapsing and relapsing
and relapsing again.
When he gets out of these centers,
by the way, the reason
that didn’t work
is because, yet again,
these centers don’t understand
that you’ve got to actually face
the original wounding that
is creating that need
for the relief in the first place,
if you want to solve the addiction.
But they didn’t.
So with these relapses over
and over and over again,
every time he gets let
out of these centers
he goes right back into his family home,
where yet again He’s turned
into the family scapegoat,
which yet again reinforces
the very patterns
that are causing him to
take oxy in the first place.
Eventually Pat is led to the understanding
that probably he should stop focusing
on his addiction to the oxy itself,
and start focusing on whatever pain
is causing him to want
to use in the first place.
This means that
with the help of a therapist,
Pat starts experiencing
all of those…
Sensations that he had
been trying to avoid.
He starts to look directly
at all of his feelings of
“not good enough”.
He looks at the painful trauma
around his father.
He starts looking at the insignificance,
why he thinks it’s there.
Starts realizing the only reason he
went into sports in the first place,
isn’t because he actually likes
the sport, to begin with.
It’s because he was always trying
to get approval from his dad.
Approval that he could never get it.
Pat was able to recognize
and change social patterns
as well as make deliberate
changes to his social group
so that he lived with and
had people in his life
that valued him just for his company,
instead of for achievement.
He was able to experience
appreciation for himself,
instead of shame,
by clearly seeing
that much of what he went through
was a projection of his father’s,
who never actually wanted a child
and whom only liked
the personal ego boost
of being able to say he
had a successful son.
Because he had that
unconditional connection
in other relationships,
he was able to let go of needing
his father to approve of him.
He found a part of himself
that loved to succeed,
because challenging himself
to succeed was fun
and no longer simply tried to succeed,
in order to earn love.
Pat now has a family of his own.
He’s been sober 11 years,
as a result of all this work he did
facing that underlying pain that
was motivating the addiction,
in the first place.
If we want to find the cause
and also the solution
to a person’s addictive behavior,
we should not be looking
at genetic predispositions,
we should not be looking at biochemistry,
we should not be looking
at this substance itself.
What we should primarily be looking at,
is the emotional and mental conditions
that we’re traumatizing.
That caused distress,
in a person’s childhood environment.
And we should be looking at how
those patterns of distress
in their childhood environment
becomes a pattern that is repeated
in their adult life.
If you’re looking back at your childhood
and current life,
and cannot specifically identify
any trauma or emotional pain,
you would benefit by
watching my video titled:
Today’s Great Epidemic
(And How To Cure It)
You should be looking at and
resolving the painful patterns
that originated from that
childhood environment,
but that continued to
play out in their adult life,
with the utmost compassion.
In order to understand compassion,
you can watch my video titled:
Compassion
(And How To Cultivate Compassion)
One thing I do need you to understand,
is that for the human species in general,
the single biggest need is connection.
It’s actually a bigger need
than even food or water.
You can understand this,
because when people go
through a breakup they often
lose their appetite completely.
The reason for this is because
we are a relationally dependent species.
When we are born,
if you put an infant out on
the sidewalk it is dead.
Connection is the only way we
can get our other needs met.
This means,
that our survival is
laced in with connection.
If we perceive
that becoming aware
that our childhood issues
were in fact what created
this negative addicted
state we’re in today,
what we feel like is that we’re
gonna lose connection
with the connections we
need the very most.
Regardless of whether those
connections are actually there
or whether they’re in our mind alone,
the most carefully guarded thing
is our human relationships.
Now naturally,
if our survival is on the line,
we are unlikely
to see something.
We’re more likely to go
into denial about it.
And so it should come as no surprise to us
that it’s very difficult
for people to identify
childhood issues and family trauma
as the reason that they’re addicted.
Because there’s skin in
the game for realizing that.
However doing so is the only way
that you’re going to overcome addiction.
And I’ll help you out in this way…
Most of the problem
that’s making it so that
you refuse to look at
these factors as the reason
for your addiction,
is because of the fact,
that you make it mean something.
If mom did this thing
and it created this negative pattern in me
and I noticed that
and I recognize it
and I have to say something like:
” Yeah, my childhood
has some issues”,
rather than: “My childhood was awesome”,
“Then, I can’t have a
relationship with mom”,
“Then, mom will get mad at me”,
“Then, she will ostracize me”,
“Then, I will be the
scapegoat of the family.”
There is always a:
“what you’re making it mean”,
that is motivating the denial,
and that denial does have to go,
if you want to overcome addictions.
I’m going to give you
your first thought step
towards the compassion
that is necessary
when you are dealing with
resolution of addiction now.
Addiction is not a character flaw,
it is not a moral issue.
The fact that it is possible
for someone to be jailed for an addiction,
as if addiction implies some
sort of character flaw
or lack of morals,
is something that the
future will look back on
with complete and total embarrassment.
Most people walking the planet today
use some kind of compulsive
coping mechanism,
regardless of the fact that it
doesn’t actually serve them
and is in fact a detriment to their life.
For this reason we must accept
that we are all in fact addicts.
And there can be no stigma
for a condition we all share.
The question is,
what are you addicted to?
Some of us have simply found
ways to become addicted
and methods
that are much more societally
accepted than others.
Have a good week.
Subtitles by: Tanya Duarte
www.tanyaduarte.com
Subtitles by the Amara.org community

100 thoughts on “Addiction and How to Overcome Addiction”

  1. Another episode that's "right on the mark" as far as I'm concerned.

    Teal…you know what I would really love a video on? An in-depth, comprehensive talk on the differences between "need" vs. "addiction". For example we "need" food and water for our physical survival. We wouldn't call those "addictions". Would you say the difference is that an addiction is merely an unconscious "substitute" for an actual need? Is it as simple as that?….or more complicated? I was sitting here questioning whether it's true that we all have addictions…and if so, what mine might be. I acknowledge that I have needs, and when they're not met, this is my process: I pause and think about the priority level of the need compared with other needs that are being met, and think about how I might "re-arrange" my priorities in a way that's works better for me. If I'm feeling "pinched" or like it's impossible to get my most critical needs met (happens more frequently than I care to say) I then go as quickly as possible toward acceptance of "what is" because banging my head against a wall in a futile situation is actually more painful and harmful than just "going without" the initial need. One example might be our need for psychological safety. This requires trust and "others" who are trust-WORHTY….and yet, let's face it, people are only as trust-worthy as their level of self-awareness can support….and the reality is that the majority of people out there have all kinds of unconscious patterns.

    Sometimes accepting (and grieving) the reality of the situation is necessary….and can actually help us not to take on "unconscious substitutes" in an effort to temporarily "fly out of that hole".

    Another thing I consider a true "need", at least for me, is "fun"/"humor"/"creativity" ….and I have learned that, without a certain amount of these,, everything else suffers. I think this often confuses people into believing everything must be "hunky dory" with me because, "if" I can find time for fun…or "if" I'm laughing and joking…all of my most critical needs must be met….and if that's not the case I must be "avoiding" through humor….when often, neither is actually true. I think it's really just a result of knowing/accepting that our all of our needs will not always be met and choosing to find and feed ourselves in the mean time with whatever joy we can find in a less than perfect world just "makes sense". Someone else may label this as an "addiction"…and who knows…maybe it is, depending on how we define addiction, but I personally it feel as a true need…and not unhealthy or like an "unconscious break" to "fly" out of hole, but rather more like self-love.

    I don't know if you want to take your message quite this deep/far, but I would certainly find your thoughts on this helpful as always!

  2. Strange dynamic…I caused my own "abandonment" and lack of connection issues with the persons I most needed validation from. ie Accepting how abusive my mom was meant that I could no longer have a relationship with her. So it is like you cut off your foot to save the rest of you. But that still feels better than living with a toxic, festering foot.

  3. Grateful blessings. I’ve shared this with friends and family and taken it to heart ♥️ Will digest it with voracious enthusiasm. Thank you for your strength, sunlight and great heart. 🌱🙏🦚

  4. Both my Parents where drug & alcohol addicted. I grew up seeing them suppress everything and numb the pain to cope with stress daily. Teal I’m so thankful for your perspective.
    In Love & Light
    Divine Pioneer

  5. I wish you could say this to every person and group that has shut me out. I resonated with this on levels I never thought I could. Something happened recently that made me realize I've been damaged, in a way, by abuse mentally from others. Those who don't understand why I act the way I do sometimes. I use to have a addiction problem years ago when my dad died. I replaced that addiction with other things. Other compulsive behaviors and i have been shut out from every place I just wanted to be apart of. I've come to the realization that I need a counselor or someone to help me, I'm going to use the practitioners on the completion process to do it. Thank you Teal. I appreciate this video.

  6. Anyone who does not love and accept the infinite as self body is not being loved and accepted all the time, which means, most of us experience pain, and adopted a healing addiction, illegal or legal. The questions is, are we hearing and caring the voices from every parts of the body, are we hearing and caring the voices from the world. Either change or accept as a freedom in life.

  7. "Hey," she said, "I know our days are numbered
    Oh, since long ago

    So hold me in this dream world

    And never let me go"

    Oh, you know time just can't be trusted

    To move like you want it to move

    It pulls you into it's slip stream

    And never lets you go

    No, no, no

    Truth be told

    We used it on ourselves first

    The mind hijacker's curse

    Its slow and tender touch

    Is now flying in our heads

    And sleeping in our beds

    Oh, we learned the secrets of the kingdom

    It slept on the bathroom floor

    Your mind was leaking out the door

    You're so scared to be adored

    But more scared to be alone

    -Chad VanGaalen

  8. Personally I was very, very addicted to shooting heroin and meth for more than ten years and in my case I think my issue was a bad case of entity attachment. I have many reasons for believing it but one things for sure, I am very relieved to no longer struggle in that way anymore. My addiction came on hard and fast and I was unable to stop using by the time I was 16 years old but at the age of 32 it went away very quickly just as it came. I was under the impression this issue would last my entire life but that is not true. Actually everything I was taught about addiction from AA and other so called authorities on the issue I have found is false.

  9. 14:30 if only it was that simple. I can't even tell what I'm running away from anymore and I'm too numbed out to tell what I feel, it's something I can't even describe. The Completion Process is all about feelings and Teal even said in one of her workshops that it's pointless if you're not in touch with your feelings. It's a complete dead end for me.

  10. Oh so true! As a recovered heroin addict I agree that every word Teal spoke is absolute TRUTH! I relapsed until I dealt with my childhood issues, which were so hard for me to see. I was scapegoated and I was afraid of hurting my family, but the truth was if I felt like my parents had met my needs for connection, love and affection I wouldn't have ever ended up using heroin

  11. @Teal Swan I was fascinated by the underlying issues for some of the common addictions. Can you say a thing about habitual MJ use, and even the inability to quit nicotine?

  12. Somehow, I see a link between this and that :

    Elif Shafak on 10 Minutes 38 Seconds in this Strange World (https://youtu.be/6-9VsPqAsLo)

  13. I hate those 20 minutes videos that can be sumup in 5 minutes. So many words and explanations to flll up space. Get to the point you all Youtubers!

  14. I wonder what predisposes people to have shopping addictions? It seems that most of us in developed countries have this addiction to some extent.

  15. Every single video of yours that I have watched brings tears to my eyes. I have been awake for a very long time but also felt isolated most of the time.

  16. I hate when people don’t see that food can be very addictive and then they just claim that overeaters are lazy with no self control. With no kindness in their words. I wish people were more compassionate to people suffering

  17. This seemed like a very long way of saying addiction is a symptom, don't cover up the symptoms and go to the route cause.

  18. You always relate everything to connection, how about fear, panic and anxiety? take social phobia for example or agraphobia or anxiety attack for example

  19. Teal! This is one of your best videos yet! Or at least the ones that I have seen haha. But anyways keep up the amazing work! Truly shared some light on why I am the way I am and those around me too . Both my lover and I are addicted to weed , I want to quit but it's hard to because we smoke together or in the home together and so what about social addiction? I guess that would mean we are both running from the problems causing this addiction that we just so happen to share and enjoy . Thank you

  20. Is truly all about pain and loneliness?
    What of boredom?
    What of adventure?
    What of curiosity?
    Connection to others who are using ?
    Is there all lot more nuance than you claim?

  21. The Secret Of RECOVERY FROM ADDICTION!!

    Why isn't always it entire? Why do I drop each time I walk a while? I have recovered for a long term and I thought it was over, but then I am addicted once more. These are a number of the questions our addicted comrades used to ask, and dependancy therapists used to get hold of them from their customers.

    #sober #sobriety #addiction #recovery #12steps #celebraterecovery #cleanandserene #refugerecovery #selfhelp #inspiration #addictionrecovery #mentalhealth #mentalhealthrecovery #soberlife #sobreityquotes #recoveryquotes #wordsofwisdom #quoteoftheday #soberliving #sobernation

    https://www.turkeycelebs.com/2019/08/the-secret-of-recovery-from-addiction.html

  22. I know there are a lot of comments like "oh I was thunking about this and you posted", but I have been addicted to my phone for at least 5 years and I was planning on commenting on todays video for you to make a video on addiction…
    I am SO GRATEFUL for this ! This is just what I needed! Thank you!
    I feel like I can finaly set myself free!
    Hope you all have a wonderful day! Love you!

  23. im sitting in my tent on the side of the railroad tracks, with the knowing and understanding that my prayers have finally been answered. Ive been addicted to heroin for 4 years . and for the past year or so ive been praying for help and a way out.
    As if this video wasnt proof enough, you and my true self guided me down this path which got me an appointment with the methadone cline in 2 days.
    Teal sawn, you have no idea how much i love and appreciate you.
    And thank you for helping our planet.

  24. I worked in a VERY expensive rehabilitation detox center as their massage therapist and she is 100percent correct on the dynamic at play there. Most people relapse over and over again usually coming back with shame based diseases like hepatitis c

  25. I went 3 months sober from alcohol to try and understand how it was serving me, and discovered that I like the numbing effect drinking has on me. But stopping alcohol didn’t solve my problems like I thought it would. It showed me where the pain is, and the pain is that I see no meaning for my life, so I engage in hedonistic activities chasing pleasure to motivate myself to keep going. After my sober 3 months, I started drinking again. I don’t drink as much anymore, I’m a lot more conscious of why I drink now, but still, my root issue feels unsolvable. I know that feeling all my emotions is the only way to understand them, and so using numbing agents is counterproductive, but even now when I know what my pain is telling me, there seems no cure for it. I guess it will take time, it’s a confusing journey. Thanks for this video Teal.

  26. Teal Swan, thankyou for everything you do for the rise of human consciousness, people really need your message.
    I would appreciate if you make a video about reputation and what to do in the loss of it.

  27. I think it's safe to put veganism into the addiction bracket along with the fastest growing delusional and dysfunctional diet.

  28. Okay Teal, it is getting scarier from week to week haha.
    It's almost like you catch up what I was spending time thinking about. Each Saturday I get an update with your thoughts on it. How do you do that?
    So much value, thank you very much.

    The scariest video so far was the one with facing reality. You literally explained my situation.
    I'm the guy (or one of those) in example 2: working my ass off for a Startup and didn't get paid a single dollar. My "business partner" never intended to pay me anything 😅.

  29. Thanks you Very much, I have learned a lot and it motivated me more to resolve the issues from my past. 🙏

  30. Yeah. So how do you address mindset with a person directly who has lost mindset?
    Yeah patterns of distress .. needs to revisit the whole system of addressing addiction with what I think you say is shadow work… ? 🙏
    And the shadow work of the parents that was never done affecting the siblings …

  31. Can you write a book about addiction? It's very needed and your perspective is extremely helpful. Thank you for sharing!

  32. They say that an alcoholic is always an alcoholic even when they are not using. I realised recently that I am in fact a non-using heroine addict (who has never used, but shares the same traits), I saw some users and really felt I understood them so deeply, how they put distance between their essence and their human experience so to avoid suffering, it was as if their souls were only attached to their physical presence by a thin thread, looking into their eyes was like looking into a long tunnel distorted by moving water inside, everything muffled, it made me so sad and I realised that I am in fact the same, and this video confirms it, out of all the things one might be trying to get away from mine is chronic anxiety and hyper vigilance, which put me firmly into the opiates category.

  33. I have 7 years clean from opiates, namely heroin. You've really hit the nail on the head; you're dead on and perfectly correct in the whole video.
    I've been following you for roughly 5 years; you really just keep getting better and better.
    I've learned so much from you.
    Thank you. Thank you. Thank you…

  34. Yeeeees, Teal YOU say that!!!! Families DO need to be involved! & I must say that recovery centers are not always like that .. my sister works at a recovery center and she HERSELF IS a recovering addict…. She has been clean for about 5 years now!!! So, she can show them TRUE empathy and compassion and can truly u understand cuz she',s been there. I'm SO proud of her. She has a 8 year old son and has a girlfriend, but she & they ARE Happy! Especially after they moved out of my parents house. (Mostly to get away from my mom)

  35. standing ovation! you put everything i have learned in YEARS of addiction into 25 minutes. i think this video could really help a lot of people – namely parents of addicts, especially ones who have just entered the nightmare. perfectly spoken as always. thank you teal!

  36. Thank you so much Teal for all your videos,it has made me get out of my shell and make a YouTube channel and be more confident with myself.

  37. Could you make a video on how to open your root chakra, you have every other one except that one, and I like the way you go through all of them. 😁

  38. let me see how good my english is and how well i can make myself understood. GTFO of my life. nobody invited you. simple enough for you ?

  39. What about gaming? I can throw some personalized guesses for myself of why I would be/have been addicted to it but I'm not an expert and I'm bound to miss the obvious. I am an online gamer and though I never relished in climbing the ranks and taking on the hardest bosses/raids/content in the game, I loved having an avatar. I loved being able to dress her up in sexy outfits, guys would fall for me and give me heaps of attention, I'd actually be welcomed in guilds and socialized with (successfully). Even after I got a boyfriend and a life, I feel like I want to go back to gaming and … have fun there. I assume it's because I was constantly rejected for being overweight and my reward receptors are shocked and can't function normally anymore now … but I still don't know where to start with fixing my gaming cravings, what am I missing?

  40. Hi Teal I want to thank you for everything you do. It enriches my life. Can you please make a video about women who have Asperger's. Greetings from Sasha

  41. I don't have any major addictions but avoidance. But I know I am emotionally deprived. Hence I have stopped seeing a therapist. I need love affection closeness. Addiction is just another adaptation.

  42. This is also an excellent video by Johann Hari on the subject of addiction with remarkable insights!

    https://www.ted.com/talks/johann_hari_everything_you_think_you_know_about_addiction_is_wrong?language=en

  43. A lot of people won't know what Mono is, I didn't:

    https://www.webmd.com/a-to-z-guides/understanding-mononucleosis-causes#1

  44. What about smoking. I'm very sick and thermal. Alone isolated svd get abused. How can I stop. I'm disable visually impaired and trapped in my home. In poverty and can't go out

  45. The song in the end is so badass, I love it. The former was stressing me out. I do appreciate both the info and the outro.

  46. For anyone thinking, there must be more to life than this! I was there too. I am not a Spiritual Elder, Bone woman, and will guide you to finding your authentic wildness. I am a new channel so any of your support would be so so appreciated <3

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